Ever see that movie Lost in Translation with Bill Murray and Scarlett Johansson? Probably not. I only saw it once and felt so alienated by its theme and pace that I hardly remember it all. But if you've ever dropped from a high place into darkness, not knowing whether you'd live or die, but knowing either way you'd be all alone with no one and nothing to bring you back but yourself, then you get the movie.
o sleep came to me the last night at home. In my head all I could hear was the songs from Rachael William's album "Elysium" repeating over and over. Its one of only three CD's I've ever bought or owned and stands in a league of its own in my opinion. Its a real heart opener. But it was something of a torture as all I wanted to do was sleep.
I was also sweating through my sheets, probably because I had a Chipotle burrito yesterday, that was a bad choice, all that hot sauce and sloppy soyrizo... they cost $16 now... They were six dollars 20 years ago... That should make me feel old, but it just reminds me how weak our money has become, and all by design in order to collapse the middle class and consolidate business into the hands of a few power brokers.
Whats surprised me most about peoples reactions whenever they find out about my trip to Japan, is the almost universal response of, "but why?” Their faces held in confused expressions, as though I had just told them I was donating my body to science while still healthy, alive and well. Perhaps it is simply the side effects of a lifetime of advertising pushing them into entirely different directions where vacations are concerned. Or perhaps it is the extreme difficulty associated with traveling there due to the language barrier, and too the great expense.
It could just as well be that so few Americans interact with Japanese people in any meaningful way outside of their cuisine, largely because the Japanese people are very insular and will not even look you in the eyes as a matter of respect. On the ugly side of the spectrum it could easily be something as simple as jealousy, not everyone gets a vacation you know. It could even be racism. After all, Imperial Japan slaughtered half of Asia and attempted to take over the world along such notorious figures as Adolf Hitler, Mussolini and Stalin. (Yes, Russia was an axis ally, before Hitler betrayed them.)
Regardless of the reasons, the next surprise came after people find out I'm going to be there for two months, at which point they repeat the same response, " but why?” at this point I'm convinced that all the reasons above are in play, but above them all is the simple difficulty of it.
Its always a special experience entering government buildings. Especially when your future hangs in the balance. Luckily in my case the worst that can happen is I don't get my passport and my none existent plans for Japan will have to wait for another day.
Knowing that my appointment at the State Department in San Francisco was at 8:30AM, I got up at 5 to prepare. Now before you ask, yes I choose that time out of a full day of possibilities. I even chose it on Wednesday instead of Tuesday in order to go on a bike ride in Big Sur, a further risk that might have prevented me from getting my passport on time. The bike ride fell through because my back was almost out. Apparently carrying a full size dishwasher down a flight of stairs alone is not a good idea...
There was once a time when astrology fell under the "woo woo" category for me, and the idea of deciding anything, especially anything important because of it was not only irresponsible but worse than gambling. At least with gambling you have a chance, right? Even so I found myself looking to the night sky as a youth, looking for permission, for a sign. One that would let me know that what I was about to do would result in good things, instead of bad ones.
