Some 10+ hours later we arrived in Bangkok. The first thing we noticed upon exiting the plane and heading down the gangway,was how incredibly different the air temperature was here from Europe. It was a change we had both been welcoming for some time, and we couldn't be happier. Before even thinking of exiting the airport, we went in the bathrooms and changed into our board shorts and t-shirts, which we would wear exclusively the rest of our trip.Zanes funds being what they were at this point in our journey, that is to say, almost nothing... we decided to both exchange a small amount at a time and try and manage it well, so we went with $50 each. We grabbed our bags, exited security and headed for the skytrain, which started underground ironically enough. We got our little plastic chip tokens from the machines lining the wall and stood in lines waiting for the security guards to check the train before anyone got on, then boarded.It wasn't long before we arrived in downtown Bangkok, the heat and pollution was depressing, even in the evening, and we soon boarded the city train heading for the central train station. It was 4:50pm, we had been planning on getting our tickets for an 10:50pm train to Surat Thani, which would have given us time to rest and get some food before trying to go through a 15 hour train ride to the South of Thailand, but just as we arrived and found the office for "foreign speakers" meaning English only pretty much, they told us every sleeper train ticket was sold out until the next day, except the last two tickets leaving at 5pm, which was in 2 minutes...We hadn't slept in the last 50 hours, had been in 3 Countries, six time zones, and had been partying like sailors, used four city trains, two taxis, and three subways, boarded and endured consecutive flights totaling 15 hours, gone from Snow to Monsoon weather, and were facing the sorry predicament of staying in a city we had no intention of being in overnight, or pushing ourselves to even greater limits in a all out push to our destination. This is Daniel Maddox and Zane Davis were talking about here, The "Elite" of exceeding the fun limits...We looked at the classic black and white circular wall clock above the lady selling tickets, the 2 minutes we had to decide evaporating into midair much like our strength and poise, then at each other. With sullen smirks etched on both our faces, but raw determination in our hearts, we nodded in unison and bought the tickets. I was pretty worried we'd have no food on the train, but once we found our seats a catering boy came by to take our orders, we gladly paid.We barely spoke on the ride, mostly all we wanted to do was sleep. What little thoughts we had outside of that essential need, were of what was to come on the "dazzling endless summer isles of paradise" we had so perfectly burned into our minds by the advertising armies of the world. A fiction to be sure, this I knew well from my travels, but a fairy tale I entertained for the sake of convenience in a mad hope that our final leg of our travels on this trip would be more relaxing and charming than that of Europe.As the sun disappeared into the West, the cabin crew started setting up the beds in the sleeper trains. Once ours were set up and our gear was reassuringly stowed away in the racks beside us, our food was brought, which if you can imagine, was super cheap Asian food individually wrapped in Sa ran wrap, on a plastic plate, itself wrapped, and then all of it wrapped in Sa ran wrap again... I suppose they thought it was pretty classy, I didn't, but it did keep our food from spilling all over us while bumping all around on the train tracks, that probably had a lot to do with it. We finished our food and we did what we could to sleep, which, to our great dismay, would prove most difficult.
A Dash to The Exit
When I woke up, It seemed as though I had never fallen asleep, like I had closed my eyes long enough to turn off the brain, but only for a moment, and then it turned back on. The first thing I did was roll to one side for a chance at going back to sleep, it was then I realized how much pain I was in, but from what? This question filled my head as I got out of bed and walked to the kitchen for some tea, where I ran into the Hungarian girl.This is where she told me all about Zane and I’s behavior at the Brew Pub last night. With every word being a small revelation. I decided to take a long hot shower and just sit at the bottom of the enclosure as the water ran, getting out and laying back down right after.It wasn’t long after that we both got up and walked back into the main plaza for something to snack on.We met up with a huge couch surfing group at a bar across town after that and this is where things got hairy. The starting lineup consisted of 4 different local beers in succession, each 1 Liter of course, and all pushed gingerly by the couch surfing host who organizes and manages this weekly group of around 30-50 people. A group we joined and got to know wanted to go to another bar, we were fine with that, so a 10 minute taxi drive later we were there.By the time we got everyone there they wouldn’t let Zane and I in because we didn’t have the correct change for the cover at the door… strange way of telling us to sober up, if that’s what it was. Anyways Zane didn’t like the place after that and went home, I stayed and danced with one of the Czech girls I met. We ended up staying up all night and before I knew it, it was 6 am, and our flight was supposed to leave at 7:20! The Czech girl and I rushed back to the hostel, waving off the person at the front desk telling me that non-guests weren’t allowed in the dorm.I woke up Zane, who had only been sleeping an hour at most, and we rushed out of the dorm as fast we could, shoving clothes in every free spot in our bags. I said goodbye to my dance partner in a blur and we got on the tram. Once at the bus station we had something like 30 minutes before our flight left, I was totally sure we’d miss our flight, totally.. Our bus was late and once on board I validated my ticket in the machine and told Zane to do the same. He checked his pockets half-assedly and shrugged, “can’t find my ticket.” “I just handed it to you, check for it.” “Nah, it will be fine.”Two seconds later the ticket police come and asked for our validated tickets, I give him mine and Zane looks for his with more serious focus and finds it, invalidated. The “officer,” or 40+ year old guy in blue jeans and a blue knitted sweat shirt that was probably gifted to him on his 30th birthday party, tells us to pay him $10, we don’t have the money, but I would refuse out of principle anyway. We tell him we just got on the bus and didn’t know. “You validated, why not him?” he asks. “He’s pretty much asleep I tell him.” Then he gets angry and tells us to pay him $40, to which I try and snatch the ticket out of his hands and go up to the driver to settle it. This really gets him going and he gets on his phone, making gestures and comments to let us believe he was calling the police.“I call police, they will wait for you at the airport” He said with a crazy look in his eye, his partner looking shrewdly at us then back at his associate. We just ignored them. When we got to the airport we got off the bus and went inside the terminal undisturbed, hearing the pair’s curses to us as they went the opposite direction.It was a straight sprint to our check in desk from outside. Of course check in was over almost an hour ago, but we soldiered on regardless. I ran to some official looking desk and asked them about our airline. He told me that the counter was closed, but if the flight was still there we might be able to get on if we went to the right desk, so I found Zane and took us to the place he pointed out. They told us that miraculously the flight was very late in taking off and if we ran the whole way we might make it aboard. We skipped straight to the front of a huge line waiting for another flight on our airline, checked in, and ran to our gate, making it with less than 2 minutes before they closed the door, what a rush!Our flight to Sweden went by without comment, except that neither of us slept. During our 5 hour layover in Stockholm however, we were approached by a young man working for some agency that was suing the airline for not notifying the passengers about the layover though,he told us we might get a few hundred out of the deal, which we thought was cool, so we signed his papers and boarded the plane to Bangkok. I can't believe we made it! Four crazy weeks in Europe, and now 6 weeks in Asia? What will happen next?
The Principles of Prague
After roughly two weeks here in Bratislava it's finally time to leave. It's been really slow in Slovakia, but I've met some good people here and had good times. Our destination? Prague. Hitlers favorite city, which is the only reason it wasn't leveled to dust like most everything else in Europe during the war. Fun fact huh? As usual I make my way to the station alone by taking the bus. And as usual Zane is late, arriving by car. I get a Subway sandwich before our bus arrives and devour it before it departs, not that I endorse Subway, or even sandwiches for that matter, which are abominations anyway you slice it, but being stuck without food on a bus or anywhere for that matter, is an undesirable situation, especially while traveling. Luckily I also had a bag of oranges for us to eat, which lasted till we ate the last two while leaving Prague's bus station. My first impressions of Prague were really very good. It is a clean city, rich in history, culture and architecture, again, thanks to Hitler, with plenty to see and do. Among Prague's other prestigious accolades are it's draw of people from all over the world for vacationing and that it has some of the cheapest and finest beer I've ever tasted, and taste it we did, repeatedly...We checked into our hostel and unloaded our bags. The whole place was themed, each room having the name of the artist who painted it on the door. Ours was peter, with a sunflower theme. Just like Hungary, the Czech Republic is outside of the European Union, thus our euros needed to be changed. We asked the young lady at the desk where we could get a good rate and exchanged some money there before heading out on the town. The first place we went was the main square, where Zane was during Christmas and incidentally where the Christmas market is held. There were a few stands set up at the end with people inside and out, handing out promotions for clubs or dealing drugs in hushed tones to those alternatively minded enough to make such a visual impression, depending on the pushers critique of you of course. We didn't buy drugs offered in hushed tones or give any serious consideration to the club promotions, we just walked on, finally coming to and crossing one of the famous bridges leading to the castle on the other side of the river that divides Prague. We got to the top of the hill, which overlooked the city in a beautiful swath of open panoramic space, then ate dinner at a monk brewery inside the old church walls. It was very strong beer, and the food was delicious. Zane said it was his first time having duck. It was all pretty pricey, but worth it. At having met our elegance quota for the day, if not the entire week, thanks to the duck and celibate recipe beer, we shifted gears and headed back to our hostel with a bottle of rum, beers, a group of Canadians and a Hungarian woman. The group of us very quickly became too loud for our surroundings and took the party to the brewery next door. There, a string of unfortunate events lead us both back to the hostel in sorrier shape than before.First, Zane and I were having a drinking contest with our 1L beers, seeing who could finish faster than the other, but I was too drunk to keep drinking so I tried giving my beer to the Hungarian woman, but Zane wasn't going to let that happen, and slapped the beer out of my hands and spilt the whole thing on the table. To which Zane started laughing uncontrollably. Then we, As in I, started yelling about this and that political thing with the Canadians, at which point they left, presumably for bed.Second, I went to the bathroom and tripped straight down the stairs nearly knocking down a waitress in my path, I curled and avoided her though. She just happened to be our waitress as well and had the stink eye on me the rest of the night, clearly with good reason. On our way out of the brewery, Zane ran and tackled me into the street, giggling as we both tumbled to the ground, but I don't remember that, the Hungarian told me the next day after I complained about how bad my ass hurt. "It was probably when Zane tackled you in the street." She said, "what, he tackled me?" I asked, totally surprised. "Oh yeah.. Pretty hard too. That's when I decided to go home, you guys were on whole other level. Do you remember what happened after that?" She asked, with mused interest. To make things easier on us both I summed up the night with," we just went out and drank more, walking a long way and then came home." All true, but completely devoid of specifics, a conversational specialty of mine usually employed by lawyers, salesman, politicians, philosophers and compulsive liars alike. What I do remember after the brewery is going to some super sleazy strip club in the same square we were earlier today, with blue tinted black lights everywhere, and shadowy characters in every corner of the establishment all thinking about the contents and limitations of things in their pants, or lack there of as it was for us. For in places like this the only thing one does is hand money to naked ladies, or leave, nothing else. So we ordered stiff drinks, finished them in a haze of cigarette smoke, watching bodies twisting and turning in ways best left to the imagination, words failing to express what is otherwise an experience held in private quarters at establishments just like this. After leaving we were immediately surrounded by shades approaching from the alleys outside the club, and were offered the same drugs by the same people as earlier, only now there was nothing hushed about their tones, no critiques or double takes in their choice of words or to whom they are spoken. If your on this street, at this hour, coming out of that strip club, your either already on drugs, or looking for some, and the guys to sell it to you are right there, they always are. So we talk to these guys for a minute and the first thing they show me is a bag of what looked like laundry detergent. Zane and I just laugh at them, pointing at the little blue balls that lined the bag. Without skipping a beat the short and stalky, leather jacket wearing dealer puts away the laundry detergent and pulls out a bag of green stuff, and when a good smell of its contents clears inspection and passes mustard I buy some before our long walk back home. Before we return to the hostel, Zane and I get pizza and veggie kebabs. Zane was out of Czech money so he used the $10 I gave to Zuzka for gas money in Bratislava, which she gave to him because she owed him $10 as well. Now Zanes using it to pay for our food.Zane woke up the next morning without any small change and swore the kebab guy just took all of the change after we got our food. I've had it happen before and we were very drunk, happens all the time. Ahh the flow of money, how creative! We then crossed the street and smoked outside the front door of the hostel, falling asleep promptly upon finishing. It was a good night, but not without it's appropriate toll.
Into The Mines
Several days later Zuzka, Zane and I drove into central Slovakia where there is a beautiful mining town in the mountains. It has an expansive history, filled with big names and important events, but that is when the gold and silver flowed from the earth here, now those days are gone, only the beautiful town and the many empty mining tunnels beneath it remain. Upon arrival Zuzka and Zane check into their hotel and I check into my hostel which is just up the street from them. We go to a brewery and I have a craft 1L beer for 5€ while Zane has a .5, he was bummed because he thought he was getting the large too. They have some chicken wings and bread and then we decide to leave the pricey establishment. They go to rest in their hotel while I go straight to the super market to get another liter of beer and some garlic bread, both sub par by far, in comparison to the restaurant we just left, but it kept me going.I return to my hostel and decide to hang out in the office, where I end up watching one of the Georgian volunteers there play World of Warcraft, with his Ukrainian girlfriend looking very bored and annoyed on the couch behind him. We talk about Warcraft and then about Russia and it's involvement in both Georgia and the Ukraine in recent times. They were nice kids. I was supposed to meet Zane and Zuzka at around 8 at this one bar called strange girl, but it was 8:10 by the time I realized and I had to run down the street to meet them. It was quickly apparent that they really didn't serve food there so we went to a place called Arch Angel, where vegan fast food is delivered, Vegan fast food? Never had that before. I ordered the stir fried wok noodles and carrot, ginger soup, totaling 5€, it was nothing special, but it did the trick. The next day it was snowing almost the whole time, the mountain town became very picturesque and pretty cold too. Zuzka was really hankering for some sweets, so we went to a little cafe so she could buy coffee and cake. From there we found the office that organized tours into the mines and walked to the meeting room where a Slovakian family of four were seated patiently listening to the guide. Then we donned our rain jackets and hard hats to descend into the mines beneath us. Naturally we had our 20 minute history lesson and safety briefing by the burly Slovakian man first, who of course only spoke Slovakian. Which is a real shame because I thought lots of his jokes were very well delivered, funny how you can tell those things even though you don't understand a single word. Zuzka said she'd translate what he said later, but that never happened. The mines were accessed from the street through a famous metal clad door that mine workers, tourists and Slovakian Presidents alike have all walked through. It was dark down there, very dark and wet, with water seeping from the stones and dripping down from stalactites. Its a very good thing Zane had his hard hat on, because if he didn't he'd likely be a vegetable now. He was hitting his head all the way down and all the way up. Being 6'4" really has it's draw backs I guess. The most interesting things we saw were the hallways leading to collapsed shafts, crazy looking fungi and frightening, big, black and red spiders with long powerful looking legs. We thought we heard bats too, didn't see them though. The tour only took an hour, but if you've ever spent time underground, you know time flows at a different pace there, and we were all happy to be outside again, even if it was still cold and snowing. Before going out to dinner we returned our gear and thanked the guide, who told Zuzka we were the first Californians he's ever taken down into the mines. We went to a pizza place that had modern decor and synchronized alternating lights beneath the bar, on the ceiling and the floor. I asked for a veggie pizza without cheese and I must say they did pretty good. I devoured the whole thing before either of my friends even halved their own pies, so that must mean it was good, right? But I'm known for inhaling food, so who can say?We walked to the first engineering University of Slovakia where they have a large garden that is home to special varieties of plants found throughout Slovakia. We had a snow ball fight there and in several other places in the town, that was pretty fun. Next we return to their hotel for bowling and gin and tonics. I wreck Zane the first game, while I'm sober, the next game he wins by a little and the last two games he mops the floor with me. We play one really fun game of fusball that I lose by one point, and then I walk up the street to my hostel and fall asleep.
The Hungarian Baths
When your waking up earlier than you should because you can no longer take in air without damaging your already completely dry throat, your probably dehydrated and should make the effort to save your own life. I reached this point by 5 AM and drink water continuously till 9, talking to the staff and eventually the hostel guests as they woke. Zane gets up at around 10 and stays in bed till 11:20. We gather our wits, make up a vague plan as to what were trying to do, our usual M.O. and then set off in search of food. We go to a Vegan restaurant I had looked up online, there we order a Vegan pizza, with spelt crust and cashew something cheese. The crust and other toppings were excellent, but the cashew cheese was unappetizingly sticky and extremely hot for quite a long time. Overall I'm happy with it though. 
Next we take a ride through the oldest, simplest and yet most beautiful subway system I've ever experienced. The entire cabin was super small and made of rich old wood, glazed over by many years of constant use. It was also very rickety and made a loud buzzing sound every time the doors opened or closed, like those you would hear in a factory. We got off at the hall of heroes stop and walked around the square where statues of these heroes lined a raised stone platform. 
They were mighty looking men indeed, one looked like a naked angel holding a sword being held back by a woman, another a fanatical priest in flowing garb holding a christian staff, but most were steel wielding warriors. Behind the statues is a big park where the Hungarian Baths are found. It is accessed from our location by a bridge that you can cross by foot or car. As you cross there is fair size ice skating ring to the right of the bridge, and an elaborate water fountain to the left. We walked past the bridge and into the park where we blaze up before entering the grand establishment, architecture wise at least. It has several rings within the structure that are subdivided into other segments where special pools with varying temperatures, ingredients, and even abilities are to be found. Some were whirlpools, others saunas, infinity pools, jacuzzi's, cold plunges and of course private massages from the experienced professionals there. We went into this one sauna that was so insanely hot and humid we left in less than one minute. We were also in a sauna that changed between three different color lights, Red, blue, and yellow, we left that one in less than three minutes because the seats were burning our butts so much. The place has a lot of people there too, from all over the world. It wasn't the cleanest pool that much is sure, but the experience is well worth your time in Budapest. We stayed a little more than four hours and then returned to the hostel after once again getting a bottle of jin and juice. Once we sat down to start drinking our Canadian friends joined us, they got a bottle of white wine which they unanimously agreed was atrocious and were thus put off from continuing to drink much else. Zane and I went our own way to a multi story super club, with cave like caverns, themed rooms, and interesting bars, filled with drunk dancing people of all kinds. We stayed out till 1 or so and went to sleep, waking up at 6:30 to make the 8am train back to Slovakia. Which luckily for us, entailed no further security checks.
Another side of Bratislava
I woke up in pain. This couch needs to be thrown out the window on to a pile of burning coals, it's a death trap! As soon as Pedro woke up I asked If I could sleep in his room, he must have known how bad the couch was because he apologized if it was hard to sleep and happily agreed to sharing his room with me. Pedro left for work and I left at around 2 pm to meet Zane in the city. I waited at the bus stop for about 10 minutes and got on board when it arrived. There wasn't anyway to get a ticket on the bus itself and the driver gave me the precise look one gives a stranger in whom no fucks can be given. I got the message and sat down promptly.Within moments we were at the substation for several bus routes in our area. A young lady attempted to help me but gave me instructions of a complicated nature that involved several transfers. None of which I understood because she barely spoke English at all. Even if I wanted to join her on the bus she was about to board, before our conversation ended a technician came up to the ticket box and started disassembling it before I could buy a ticket. Thus I was left with the only option I had left, take Pedro's advice and board bus 70, and so that is what I did. Along my journey through the barren fields outside of Bratislava, I witnessed the faces of local people from a region of the world half familiar to me from my own heritage and half alien. This being my first time in Eastern Europe I wasn't really sure what to expect, but I immediately Sensed a coldness and sadness to it, unlike that which I've experienced in Germany or Korea, both of which share their own brand of national shame and regret, but this, this is something different. Korea deals with its eternal sadness as it being apart of their cultural identity, a fact easily seen through their everyday lives and also their excellent entertainment of the dramatic variety. While Germany's shame is mitigated through the eternal pursuit of order, and excellence, and all whilst living with constant reminders that they once hailed the banner of earths last great boogie man. In Slovakia though, the sadness and shame are to be found in the attitudes of the people in General. Many seek to be totally separated from anything Slovakian, preferring to call themselves European. The second world war ended with Czechoslovakia becoming two countries, the Czech Republic and Slovakia, Slovakia getting the worst end of the bargain. After that communism came and all semblance of life as they once knew was eradicated through strict and brutal Soviet policies. To top it all off they were quickly dropped into "capitalistic democracy" when the Soviet Union collapsed in the early 90's and are even now slow to meet this new paradigm. After all they've been through I imagine they're reluctant to believe in any new system that is handed to them. Once I reached the station I checked my messages and realized that the last thing I had told Zane was that I'd meet him, but I didn't specify the time. Not one to twiddle my thumbs I went to the nearest pub and got a beer so that I could use their wifi. Which I didn't need to do because the bar tender gave me the password before I even ordered anything, but I felt obliged non the less.Once contact with Zane was made, I stood on the foot bridge waiting for him. Many people came and went, but Zane took a long time to arrive, and since neither of us had cell phones we couldn't contact each other unless we got wifi. It's a throw back to the good old days when no one had cell phones and if we planned to meet somewhere, we damn sure would, or somebody would be waiting and then leaving without ever knowing what happened, until they got home, or talked the next day. I miss those times. Zane arrived 40 minutes late, I met him and smiled as he told me about how he had lost track of time, he couldn't see then that my German blood was boiling from this affront to punctuality, order and reason, because my face was the picture of calm and tranquillity. A skill I have barely learned to use in the last year or so. Usually I just blow up and live up to the title Blake gave me once during a mushroom trip that I told him not to make a scene in, "Daniel Maddox, the KING of making a scene, is telling me not to.. Ahaha!" He said.We found a nice little pub in which to eat and drink, that was darkly lit and furnished with equally dark furniture and giant wooden spool tops hanging from the ceiling. We drank 1.5L of IPA beer, then bought a bottle of Gin and juice to bring to the couch surfing party we were heading to next. We got directions for how to get there from the bar tender but she suggested we just take a sanctioned taxi from their pub. Which would be cheaper, safer, and faster than the unsanctioned kind.We being the rebellious, trail blazing Californians that we are, totally ignored such sound advice and headed out in the parties relative direction. After walking for quite a while, and seeing no point in going on, we hailed a cab, presumably unsanctioned, and then obviously so, when he charged us 17 dollars to drive 7 kilometers... But we made it there safe and sound, thats the important thing. At the door to the apartment building we rang upstairs and a young ladies voice answered, "whats the password?" "Um... We have no idea" "Daniel?" "Yes it's me" "come on up" and the door buzzed open. We started climbing the stairwell when Vierka met us half way. "My names Vierka, pleased to meet you." She said enthusiastically as she led us up the stairs to her apartment, which was packed with 8+ couch surfers from the world over. We entered into a kitchen set ablaze with several international dishes at work from a few different chefs. Vierka had set up a cook off between all her couch surfers and we were witness to it. The alcohol driven merriment was also in full swing, as several massive bottles of beer 2.5L each were already empty at the table. Once we added our gin and juice to the mix things really picked up. As usual I was immediately sucked into the most philosophical and political discussion possible, this time with a Turk named Burak, as we heavily debated world politics and religion, the others tuned out and discussed their own lives and travels, this being the usual case, we continued on unabated. Vierka told us of a cool bar in town with live music, so five of us, including Vierka, Zane and I, decided to go. While several others, including Burak remained at her house. We left her apartment, took the city bus and made it to the city center. There we came to Zborjnas bar, where Zuzka was already waiting for us. It's a small little place with a tunnel like shape and feel. Zane left early because Zuzka wasn't happy about us arriving at 11 when we said we would be there by 10 or 11, and she arrived at 10. I stayed with the crew and rocked out to the hip band until near closing, then we took a trolley and then a taxi home since the busses had stopped running. I got to Pedro's and passed out in his bed.
Thanks to Masala
In the morning the ladies make a super big breakfast, but all I can eat is the sliced apples and orange juice. Meanwhile Tal and Peter ravage through the bread, cheese, eggs, meat and butter like starved wolves in a chicken coop. After the slaughter we join the Israelis on a journey through the city. They are on their own mission, I just wanted food and water, so we eventually split up. We may be in the capital city, but that doesn't matter, it's Sunday and this is still Germany, and that means that almost everything is closed. So we walked for what seemed like hours, looking for food and water. Eventually I really slowed down, Zane was always at least 15-20 feet ahead of me, which isn't unusual considering his super long legs and quick speed, but this was ridiculous. It was cold too, and eventually Zane and I made the call to return home. Paying a premium for a little bottle of water in the train station, which Im still happy for regardless.By the time we get back to Annika's I have enough bloating and pain in my stomach to know I'm in for a long couple days running back and forth to the throne room, and I'm pretty damn sure it has everything to do with that sweet and sour slop I ate at Masala, the Indian joint yelp thought so highly of.From dusk till dawn I'm squirting Masala like nobody's business. Getting up so often that at one point I decide to just stand over the sink drinking water to continue the next volley thats sure to come. By morning I'm a zombie, wrecked on so many levels its sad. I need food so bad at this point that I leave the house before anyone is awake and go to the market. I slam my finger in the door jam on the way out, a blood blister from the start, just great.. At the super market I get apples, mixed salads that came with their root ball in the bag, very interesting, and an avocado.I eat alone until Annika comes in the kitchen and makes a few cups of coffee, both of which she drinks to her face before she can muster anything more than "hey"... Apparently she's not a morning person, and today, neither am I. At first Annika was going to meet us somewhere in the city, but this was not going to happen, I knew that much. Fortunately for us she quickly finished what she had to do and we all take the bus to a Russian war memorial in Treptower park on the outskirts of town. The place is a graveyard for 80,0000 Russian soldiers who died taking Berlin, its a fairly large rectangle lined with massive iron gates, emblemed with the classic communist star. The entrance is flanked on either side by huge statues of Russian soldiers baring arms and heavy winter coats, while the sides are unmarked graves lined with depictions of the communist struggle against fascism, all of which leads up to the biggest statue of them all at the back. This statue is of a burly russian commander crushing the nazi swastika under his boots, which towers above the pavilion on a mound. Under which lies a little gated room filled with mosaics. I believe it was the only marked grave there. But I can't be sure, since there was no writing I could understand. Next Annika took us to a Mexican restaurant which I only used for the throne, while Zane had a chicken casadia and a beer. From there Annika brought us to the city gate and left us to take her English exam. We wanted to enter the Reichstag, an impressive parliament building erected after the war to commemorate those in office who were slaughtered by Hitlers men for opposing them, but the next available tickets were for the night time, several hours away and we didn't go for it. Instead we head to check point Charlie, the most famous checkpoint between East and West Germany during the cold war, where so many people were shot and killed trying to escape from the Communist regime, including dozens of West Germans who were aiding them in their escape. Its a pretty interesting place. There were actors there in uniform posing for the tourists. By the time we get home Im a gas bomb ready to blow, and I do, just as I sit down on the throne. It was like having several balloons in my body all releasing at different times, the human body really is an amazing thing... Im so exhausted and weak that when Zane talks about going out to the club I half laugh out loud, but mostly cry a little to myself at the thought of actually attempting it. Luckily for me Annika returns from her test and nurses me back to health. She gives me some black Chinese medicine balls, much like those I had in India during our Sk-23 adventure, only those were white. Then she puts a hot water bag on my belly because I'm shivering and feeds me those little pre toasted pieces of bread that my German Grandma (Oma) used to dip in her coffee, only I dip it in peppermint tea, since I don't drink caffeine. I've got to eat something to fill the gaps that are now expanding exponentially inside me, and this fits the bill nicely since I can hardly stand the sight of food right now. I pass out in Annika's room for a power nap, wake up to a bowl of mushed bananas which I slam down. Pack my bags for our bus to Oma's tomorrow and now Zane is leaving with Annika to the clubs, which although was the impetus for our trip to Berlin, I have absolutely no intention of going to, thanks to Masala..
Last Night In Amsterdam
I got up early and had two apples in the cafeteria alone. Zane was still asleep, I knew there would be nothing for me there, but still, I just wanted to eat in the same space as the other people there. As much of a lone wolf I seem to be at times, Im really much more of a social animal than I admit to be, even to myself. A reality most lone wolves probably share. When Zane woke up we left for the city center to have brunch, Zane didn't feel like a salad, so Venkel was out, which meant we'd have to discover something new. After walking about aimlessly in our usual way through the city center I chose a place that in the end, was way too expensive and low quality in both portion and taste for the price. Kinda bummed at the whole affair we returned to WoW and after a short rest headed back out at around 6ish for our last night out in Amsterdam. We had our first two pints each at the same place we played pool last night. We played four games together, Zane won the first game easily, I beat myself the next two games by calling the wrong hole for the 8 ball, but won the final game. Just as the night before, after playing a few games of pool the establishment told us the table was closed. Then when we left and swung around later the table was open again for other players... Was it just us? Or do they do that for everybody all the time just to keep the competitive nature in people down to a minimum? I couldn't say. Whatever the case may be, Zane was sure it was because of his pool playing prowess and they couldn't have unbeatable players ruling the table.Since we were now fairly inebriated, the next thing to do was to smoke, this time it was my idea, so I got to choose the place. Remembering a sweet little shop we entered before but left for lack of a bong, I decided to go there. On our way, as we were crossing a small bridge ,we saw a man flailing on the ground, twisting and reaching for things round him. He seemed to be alone but I couldn't really say. He wouldn't be for long, because a moment later several security personnel appeared and held him down. He screamed and continued to shout in panic as they then dragged him away behind an ambulance. From the looks of him, he was most probably on a strong psychedelic, mixed with all the usual suspects, tobacco and alcohol. Which in a major city environment such as Amsterdam spells disaster for almost anyone not well versed in the trans-dimensional arts. Inside this little shop I bought a gram of something and rolled it up into a pure joint. We went up to the upper level and sat by the window, watching as that poor guy was being sedated by a gang of strangers sent to take him away. It wasn't long before the shop would close, in fact we had to power smoke the joint just to beat their closing, which was fine by us. I still had some unrolled marijuana left, but I didn't care to smoke it in the morning, so I just ate it plain, which is actually not all that uncommon for me, it doesn't get you nearly as high, but its far better for you than smoking it.We went into a few more bars after that, including the karaoke bar we met the Belgian girls, which was now full of 50 high school German kids, so we didn't stick around. Then Zane convinced me to go to a live sex show, but I instantly regretted it before we got inside and backed out the last second. Instead we decided on a topless bar, which cost 5 Euros to get into for the night, instead of 2 Euros a minute for the sex show. We get into this place and its all run by ladies, topless ladies, there isn't a single lady there with a top on, so it's well and truly a topless bar. Everywhere you looked there was a seductress of one flavor or another waiting for the smallest excuse to run up to a guy and trap him in a lap dance, or better yet there was a bleach blond white girl at the bar who would fling her legs around your unsuspecting head and work her thighs as she held onto a metal bar above the catwalk. That was my first impression. My second impression came down on me like the sword of Damocles, in the form of a huge black woman dancing in dangerously sharp heels on the bar. She flew down from the walkway that her and the other girls were dancing on and then she went looking wildly at each man before her with her piercing gaze. Finally she came to me and grabbed my shirt pulling me to her, I immediately threw my hands up and made every effort to indicate I had no money to pay her for the service, luckily she saw this to be true and moved on to a well dressed white man in his 60's, he tried the same technique but she wasn't buying it and he literally had to run away from her, not once but three times! At this she jumped back on the bar and tore off her underwear and went harder than ever on the pole. Three other men rejected her in the same way as she attempted then to reel them in. But I'm sure that a man befitting her caliber would be around sooner or later.by huge I mean she easily had 70 pounds of pure muscle on me and could probably pop my head open like a rotten melon between her thighs. This is not to say she was unattractive, she was simply too much woman for me or anyone there apparently to handle. Zane spent €37 on two gin and tonics that glowed in the bar light, which made is both broke for the night, so we left as soon as they were empty. We were pretty smashed when we left, I don't think we even knew where we were going. We were following behind a group of girls when suddenly and without the slightest warning one of them smashed her head into a stores plate glass window at full force. Luckily Zane and I were just in time to grab her limp body and help her down. Instantly every one of her friends disappeared, leaving just us and this poor girl who had just knocked herself out cold. She came to in a few seconds and we explained what happened to her, she seemed to understand so we helped her up, then just as soon as she seemed to be all together her eyes roll back in her head and she begins to spasm out, this time falling to the floor so quickly he couldn't catch her. This is when her friend comes back with the police. "Do you know this girl? What happened?" They say cooly, with complete detachment, obviously having seen this same thing hundreds of times before. 
Zane tells them "We were behind her when she just hit her head, we don't know her," and then I show them the mark she left on the window. Before we leave Zane gets a one on one with the girls friend and tells her that she really needs to watch her, she could really hurt herself. We leave the seen content with our part in the story and make it to the night bus, getting home by 2am, and so concludes our first trip to Amsterdam!