It has been a long and arduous journey to get to where I am now in life regarding emotional, spiritual and conscious growth. From the moment I was invited to work and live at Esalen I knew the sands of time had run thin for the life of ruin and sadness I had wrought for nearly 30 years.The most meaningful and transformative moments in life often come knocking at the doors of our being in ways we could not have foreseen before they do, and yet they manifest themselves in perfect alignment with whatever consciousness we hold while in the labrynth of joy, misery and majesty that our journeys throught time and space bring.For me, the transformation from unconscious to conscious existence is far from complete, but closer than it has ever been. All roads lead to greater awareness, whether they be quick and relatively painless or excruriating and nearly eternal in duration. The path we take is always one of choices, and the way through, a seemless expression of those choices made. Coming to realize this Fact is the first great leap into deciding ones destiny, and aligning oneself to Truth, no matter the cost, is the last.At the gates of Esalen the invitation to drop ones bagage howls in the wind itself, swirling like oil and water in a typhoon ablaze. Only what IS, always was and forever shall be, remains in the settling dust.All of our lives we are at the mercy of those around us, especially when feelings and emotions are concerned. It is only when we come in contact with our inner and higher self and find it's pure and ever embracing love and light, standing unmoved and unchanged by our lower selves and the urges that dominate them, that we know the difference between true Care, and the chaotic whims of others, and their feelings, judgements and actions toward us, which I refer to here as entropy.My first few days at Esalen were filled with the usual feelings of shock and awe that accompany the views of raw natural beauty and awesome vortexical energies of the land. This, I was told by B, one of my best friends, who also works at Esalen, was part of the honeymoon period that all new visitors and employees experience.B, who once went by another name, thus inspiring me to now go by D, went on to explain that if one truly wishes to last the test of time working or even studying at Esalen, you'll need more than a good work ethic and ability to remain open to new experiences. You also need to truly connect to the land, remain in the "no mind/new mind state" and be willing to journey alone to the infinities within yourself, for it is only there, and in this way, that Truth, Love and Freedom are found and lived.My first week at Esalen was marked by old habits of choosing lower impulses and ignoring the parts of me that knew better. Whats hardest to change about yourself isn't what hurts you most, but what feels good in the moment, yet hurts others over the longest period of time, and thus negatively effects far more people. As the old saying goes, The road to hell is paved by good intentions, and with carefree pleasures as well.Entropy can only hold us in its grasp so long as we choose to live in willfull ignore(ance) of universal Law and the effects of our actions. Every connection, no matter how small, echoes into eternity. Everyone and everything is part of a cosmic energetic ocean of relationships, bound to cuasality. To maximize my time and efforts to grow while on this Earth, I must never forget this, and always embody the highest expressions of Love in relation to the world and all within it. For I am they, and they are me.#esalen https://www.esalen.org